Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[GlassHalfFull]

Hi to anyone there...
I've nowhere else to turn. My dtr is unwell again with constant hullucinations and fear. If the battle to get help wasn't enough I'm now facing loosing my job as I am not able to meet the inherit demands (travel to other sites). This isn't very often but one by one my family are pulling out. It's too hard.. Or going on for too long. Or I don't know..
We have just got the NDIS planning meeting done but still waiting for services to start. Still not sure really who or what help there will be.
I am laying next to her as she sleeps.. Silently crying for the amount of loneliness and isolation I feel.
Please tell me there are other single mothers with no family that have worked a way to care and support their child?

[Former-Member]

Hello @GlassHalfFull

My situation is similar with friends, family and I did lose my job a couple of times due to dealing with trauma. I am also a single mother. Every week and day is different but I somehow manage to still care for my daughter as much as I don't feel like I am doing a good job at it currently with everything I am going through emotionally.
It is hard with lack of support and hard when unfortunately we have pushed people away at the same time. I am trying my best to support us both though it's really hard you have to fight like hell to sort it all out
It's hard lining up care, work and everything else with the time arrangements & requirements needed from us with work hours etc. I don't have anyone else able to pick my little girl up from and to school so somedays it is real tough managing it but you do manage somehow

Sorry you are going through all of this

[GlassHalfFull]

Thankyou @Former-Member. Hearing that helps me feel less alone.. Less like it's my fault we are not thriving. Thankyou for sharing

[Former-Member]

It isn't you're fault @GlassHalfFull
You sound like you are doing everything you can but suffering, Something I have learnt since becoming a single mother...
You can't make everyone happy
Most employers only think of money not what is happening in someone's personal life.
Though in saying that some are amazing, considerate & understanding.
Next year I am on the way to changing careers to set up better, at the moment we do ok. It's stressful being a single mother you are not alone and I heard you in this post that is why I commented, things will happen for you

[patientpatient]

Hi @GlassHalfFull,

Similar feelings here (though I'm the dad and sole carer for my son who has Sz). Tried to juggle work (switch to part-time, plus work-from-home days) but was the first person to be retrenched when the place was re-organised. Couldn't leave son alone at home and, after two difficult years, have ended up doing work-from-home contract work (computer-based, publishing).

I think family and friends pull out because of time. Everyone expects someone with an "illness" to get better. After a while, they stop asking about health. Conversation dries up: can't talk about uni results, sports achievements, latest job, latest holiday, next holiday, house plans, parties. Can't turn up to gatherings and always change plans at the last minute. Only the genuinely dedicated and interested family/friends will stick around after all that.

Is your daughter receiving treatment? My son's been on meds for 6 years and is much more settled now than he was in his early twenties. At that time, it was "all tunnel and no light" and that sounds like where you are now. Finding the right treatment is the key. For us that's been psychiatrist/meds/psychologist for son, and psychologist for me. Conversations with a good psychologist have been really helpful.

[GlassHalfFull]

Oh my goodness I can't even reply as your message was so relatable. Thankyou I just needed some reassurance that other people are on this path I find ourselves on. Thankyou @patientpatient. Fighting in our rural town to get psychiatrist on board.

[GlassHalfFull]

I feel so grateful to ha e this forum where I can recieve such well-rounded advice and support. Thanks again

[Former-Member]

Can relate to you in the sense that I've experienced psychotic episodes and now i'm out of work and university =/ getting back to see my friends now, taking things one step at a time. We'll make it back 🙂 best of luck.