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Contributor

My story

Hi everyone,

 

I am feeling a bit sorry for my self tonight and lonely. So I went looking for somewhere to get my thoughts out and found this forum. I care for three children and a husband, who all have ADHD. My husband has depression. My eldest has severe depression, anxiety, attempted suicide last year and is attempting to sit HSC. My middle child has anxiety and my youngest doesn't yet have a disgnosis but has big emotional outbursts. One out burst just finished and it was on and off for two hours. And my husband is being retrenched.

 

No-one other than my family's large medical support team, now counting 5 psychologists, 2 psychiatrists, two GPs and a paeditrician know everything. I see a psychologist to help me understand and cope with my responsibilities and some friends know some things but my family values their privacy and mental illness is stil a stigma.

 

So discussing how things are really is hard. 

 

To the world out there I want to say Life sucks. Money is about to get really tight, my husband is wrapped up in his depression, we might have to sell our home and my kids set each other off. I work 30 hours a week and every day I expend large amounts of emotional energy managing outbursts and symptoms of mental illness. 

 

I know I don't get control any of this and I know I am doing the best I can. But sometimes I want a break, a realignment of the stars and someone to share load.

 

Tonight is one of those times. Thank you for listening. Now its off to bed, to start afresh tommorrow.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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20 REPLIES
Senior Contributor

Re: My story

Hello @Ghost

 

It is tough - hubby and three kids who all have needs  - yikes - I would imagine that trying to keep order woukd be like herding cats.

 

Feeling lost and alone having to do it all on our own is not easy and not sustainable, having the psychological help is great, are you able to get some practical help too? It is tough going and heart breaking as we see the ones we love struggle. Then there are the social and financial losses that go hand in hand with this - living grief.  

 

Whilst our situations are so very different,  please be assured, you are not alone. There are people here who understand

 

Sending very gentle thoughts your way.

 

Darcy

 

Re: My story

Hello @Ghost

 

A very warm welcome to the forums, it is nice to meet you Smiley Happy

 

I can't imagine how difficult things are for you, it sounds like you are constantly having to be there for everyone in your family with limited time just for you to enjoy life. It is great to hear you have a Psychologist for some much needed support although it does sounds so hard with the stigma and friend not being very understandable or helpful.

 

I am really glad that you have reached out to the forums, you are certainly not alone in this. If you do feel like dropping in for a hot chocolate and to say "hello" you can here OR introduce yourself here on those 2 threads.

 

I look forward to getting to know you better,

Lunar

Re: My story

thank you for the support

Re: My story

Thank your for your support @Lunar

Struggling with how to start, do I just introduce myself again on the link you provided? and not sure how hot chocolate works. Is it an opportunity to say how life is going on a regular basis?

Re: My story

Hello @Ghost and welcome to the forum

how are you today Heart

talking about things is good , before I came here I was a mess , to come here and to see that we are not alone really helps

my husband has MDD, inherited depression and anxiety and bipolar 2 , I am his second wife and I have 4 stepchildren who are adults now  and they all have some degree of inherited depression and axiety and 2 of them have ADHD

I have looked after other children who had adhd in the past as well

so sending you a knowing hugs

so please talk here with us @Darcy, @Faith-and-Hope

Re: My story

Hearing you loud and clear @Ghost ..... mi issues are leaking out of our family, and what limited diagnosis we have had indicates an underlying familial disorder based in personality type.  My hubby is masking an eating disorder, which is not sustainable long term, but he is still “getting away with it” at the moment ..... and youngest two are under psychiatrist / psychologist support for anxiety and depression ..... so we are living with that sense of fragmentation too.

 

Hot Chocolate is our virtual cafe on the Carer’s side of the forums.  It’s a place where carers have a bit of a re-group and connect with others who understand the struggles, and chat for some company.  I will tag you from there ....

Re: My story

Thanks @Shaz51

 

While I would not wish your circumstances on you or anyone, just hearing your story makes me feel better. It is nice to know others are managing with similar issues with multiple family members. Damn genetics is all I can say. 

 

This weekend has been good. I have managed to get some rest, clean my house with my hubby and yes my kids help. It is amazing how just having time to do a little catch up of the routine can make you feel more settled and ready for what ever is next.

 

I hope your weekend was good.

 

Regards

Ghost

Re: My story

Lovely to hear your weekend went well @Ghost and the family chipped in to clean the place up. 

Re: My story

Hi, Im the same. Not sure where to start.

I was dianosed with PTSD after years of IVF. Got a point in my life where I felt incomplete because I couldnt be a father like everyone else. After having thoughts of suicide I knew I had to get help. I was one of the lucky ones!!

Been dealing with anxiety and depression for the last 25 years. 

After having two great kids and dealing with the normal life issues I had a motorcycle accident that almost killed me. A ruptured spleen and by time I got to hospital I had about 15 minutes left before not being here.

Then my family packed up and left town without any reason given or notice. My father, sister and brother inlaw which left a huge hole in my kids lives with no reason given.

Then my wife developed a gastro desease in which she had her large bowel removed. High levels of steroids left me running interference between my wife and the kids due to the roid rage and mood swings. 

Now my father inlaw has dementia which has all the effects being impacted on everyone around him.

my wife an I had a huge fight just recently in the two drive home which left me battling my depression and anger. This is the blackest Ive ever felt in which I struggled to gain control. 

Sorry for the rant, not often I get an opportunity to let this out. I have so much crap going through my head I left trying to analyse it and come up with an answer.

I know what needs to be done but sometimes it's easier to run with the black friend I know so well.

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