11-05-2018 01:32 AM
I haven’t been on sane for what seems like ages. I confess, I forgot it existed. Now I remember and I’ve come back at 1:30am, afraid to sleep.
There are new boards and everything. I like that.
I’m here at this time because I’m afraid to sleep. I have DID, PTSD and now my biggest health issue, I’m alcoholic... and still drinking. DID makes quitting complicated but right now that’s not the main thing. I just lost motivation. Being shitfaced has become my life goal.
Wonder if this will be deleted. I forget the details of rules here. Sorry mods.
11-05-2018 02:36 PM
12-05-2018 03:17 PM
If I remember right you are also a brilliant dude with lotsa talent.
So I hope some better more interesting goals show up shape shifting in the light among the trees ....
Good to see you @-Rayne-
14-05-2018 11:21 PM - edited 14-05-2018 11:36 PM
Welcome back to the forums and it's great that you can be open and talk realistically about your struggles with alcohol and other things. That old demon drink helps to numb things out for a while, doesn't it? And as you rightly say, it robs one of motivation and energy to try something else to move forward.
I'm sure you will get plenty of support here and chats with people who are using alcohol to cope with mental illness to some degree.
Take a look at the forum guidelines here when you have 10 minutes and you will be up to date with everything. We can overlook SF but other profane words may be edited
17-05-2018 05:56 PM
I'm in that confused place where your head just spins and everything seems to connect to everything else and there's no obvious place to jump off the merry-go-round.
I drink because I'm stressed. I'm stressed because I'm broke and failing at everything. I'm broke and failing at everything because I drink so much. Being stressed makes me dissociate. Dissociating too much makes me fail at everything. Failing makes me stressed (wait, I said that already).
I have no psych at the moment because I'm broke so sorta alone with my chaos. I'm trying to jump out of the loop by getting a job that will allow me to move and hopefully apply for bankrupcy to address some of the stress. But the stress of job-searching seems to be making all of the above worse.
Thanks for reading. So glad this place is still here and thriving.
17-05-2018 08:25 PM
18-05-2018 05:22 AM
@-Rayne- Sorry you are caught on the merry go round, not being merry at all. I was wondering if you have thought of looking for a social worker until you can afford a psych? I have found a really supportive one where I am. They might be able to help in other areas also, they can be good all rounders, sorry about the all rounders and you being caught on the merry go round.
Here listening if you need to talk.
@Former-Member Hi there, listening if it's helpful
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