Lived Experience Forum

[Appleblossom]

Glad you rewrote what I said.  @Sophia1 I was just putting something out, grappling with situation, but your words come closer to the truth.

I have very formal aspects too.. lol 

I have found that when I think of people as clueless when I am in a good mood I am much kinder.  All people struggle with inner contradictions and so how that shapes usually is different for everyone.

Hope you are not too bad atm Eude @eudemonism

[eudemonism]

@Sophia1

Hi, thanks for your kind and caring reply. 

Each day I'm learning something new. Reading helps with learning. Especially about other people's experiences. Also talking with like minded people who are on the same page. I find that very helpful also. Unfortunately there is no one size fixes all solution. 

Resenting and repenting have played a huge role in my mental problems. From start to finish. These two elements have been right in the midst of everything that is driving my psyche. 

I suppose you could say... I'm a backyard researcher of such things... And I'm not about to discredit or dismiss the very essence of how my mind works... And what I'm learning... 

I'll deal with one issue at a time in a simplistic and meticulous way. Which is proven to work. Or proven to produce good results. And I'm going to search out people who are on the same page and support me with my venture. 

I've been slipping in and out of mental phases. Which have been influenced bye the people in my life. And how I conduct myself. But ultimately... I'm only responsible for myself (as we all are) and I place my full trust in God's will to guide me in the right direction. And to be there for me whenever I need. 

Your friend Eude 

[eudemonism]

@Appleblossom

Hi, thanks for your insightful reply. 

Yea... I'm thinking about all sorts of elements which have been effecting my mental and physical health. And I'm really interested in understanding them better. And finding other people who also have experience with these matters, know what I'm talking about and understand how it works. (perhaps a specific education course I could endeavour upon would be good for me) 

It's like hello. Society is so important. And resenting and repenting are at the foundation of each individual member of society. Or maybe it's something only the empathetic introvert would understand. 

Eude 

[eudemonism]

@Sophia1

I think that when you're trusting in your fellow man. You're simply bring lead astray. And yes, it's very easy to do... And yes, it's very deceiving and confusing... You need to be beware. 

I think some people get a kick out of having people who are dependent on them. And I think it's for their own best interests. And in all honesty it can be a very toxic situation. 

I'm a social creature. I need social interaction. I do my best to respect everyone. But when I'm relying to heavily on people  I eventually snap or crack a tantrum. Because I genuinely believe it's all about their own best interest. And I begin carrying way to much resentment. And I'm thinking, why? What did I do too deserve this? So I seek other people to be around. Different influences. Which mean I get better results for myself. 

Eude 

[eudemonism]

@Sophia1

I'm logging off for a while. I hope you have a good and settled evening. 

Eude 

[Appleblossom]

Its normal @eudemonism Most people need some people in their lives. We are social animals. Though some take more than they give.  Its about getting a balance of people and knowing one's limits.  I am learning about boundaries very slowly.  I am logging off too.

[eudemonism]

@Sophia1

Quote 'thinking about strategies only works when the mind is settled' YES this is true... 

I was reading a book yesterday afternoon. And it was talking about acceptance of things, people, situations, environment, ourselves and ect. Not being what we expect them to be. And how it causes unrest. 

Over the past decade I've been dealing with regular  restlessness, agitation and uneasy feelings. And I've been dealing with these feelings in a rather negative way. And I've never really found a consistent peace, serenity and tranquility. Because of the way I've been thinking about things. So I've reached out the AA to try and help deal with this and overcome my problem. As alcohol is a problem for myself. 

The book talked about concentrating on internal feelings and finding peace. Instead of looking toward external influences (addiction) for answers. I've spent so much time an energy trying to control things that cannot be changed. Instead of  worrying about what I can change. 

Eude. 

[Mulgajane]

I'm so glad to hear that you have reached out to AA @eudemonism

I have been listening to you talk and you seem very cerebral. My personal experience was that I tried endlessly to fix everything with my brain. I thought I could think my way out of my problems. AA taught me to act instead.

The first time I went for a couple of months and then used the classic athiest's excuse to leave (I don't believe in all that God b*llsh*t). It took me many years before I went back out of sheer desperation. I had no ego left by then so I kept my head down and just did what they said. I am almost six years sober now and have never been happier.

My two points of advice would be to go to as many different meetings as possible and to listen to the folks that have been sober for 10, 20, 30 plus years. They've got the goods!

Good luck 🙂

[Sophia1]

Good morning @eudemonism

Reading is a wonderful way of learning...sometimes offering us a chance to look  at our lives from different perspectives...

Quote:   And it was talking about acceptance of things, people, situations, environment, ourselves and ect. Not being what we expect them to be. And how it causes unrest. 

Accepting people...situations as they are is important....this is part of empathy....

as long as we consider ourselves in the  equation...

It is not wise to allow others to disrespect us or for us to not be true to our values...

Acknowledging that alcohol has been a major factor in adding or masking the confusion in your head is a huge step...

Taking that first step forward to overcome the addiction that long term use of alcohol can bring is huge...

Again you have so much strength..

Listening to others who are using the AA method will  be valuable for you now and moving forward...

I like the suggestion that has been made to attend different meetings...

this can also open up opportunities to meet many new friends...

I am so proud of you Eude...perhaps this is a new path that will bring much positive change for you in your ongoing journey of self-discovery....

Note: Whatever I write comes from my heart and is of course only my opinion...neither right nor wrong....trust in your own intuition always...

keep  on writing

Sophia

[eudemonism]

Nouns, proper Nouns, plurals, adverbs, adjectives, conjunctions, 

Past tense, pretense. 

Food for thought... 

@Sophia1@Mulgajane

@Appleblossom@Former-Member