@Bella1978. I can only imagine how hard it's been for you. Reading yiur posts on your other thread, I've been worrying that yiu are wearing yourself out.
The fact is your mum has changed. When she's not well with her MI, she's unable to be that same mother that you miss so much. Add in the UTI and other physical problems. That's a lit going on for her.
So yes, I can empathise a lot with what your mum is going through. I feel for her. But ........
Now I'm going to play devils advocate.
When your mum is having a good day & she says to you - it's my way or you can leave - be strong - be honest. Tell her she can't live alone. She is not well enough. So she can either have you as her carer, or a stranger or go to a home.
So. You will also have a say in things at home. Yes it's her house, but it's yiur home too.
Tell her what will happen (once you sort out what you need) - eg: a nurse / carer will come one day a week sit with her. Yiu will be going out. To socialise or study or shop or drink lots of coffee in cafes. Whatever you want. Maybe you need more home care for chores. Or meals on wheels 3 days a week.
But you need to have breaks. Yiu need to be able to do new things. Join a club. Go for long walks. Etc.
You don't need to be rude to mum - but let her know the situation as honestly as you can. She can't live alone.
Respite once a month if you could get it would be good. And maybe you can get her brother to have her over one day or night (possible sleep over) a fortnight.
Wait and see what the doctor has to say next week about your mum. Til then, take time for you every day. Housework can wait. Or just do the bare minimum.
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