Our stories
Hi @Exoplanet, @outlander, @greenpea, @CheerBear, @Shaz51, @Teej, @Faith-and-Hope, @Dadcaringalone, @soul, @Sophia1, @saturnzoon, @Appleblossom, and everyone,
The past few weeks have been tough in my world. Yesterday's long, dark post was me at a real low point. But today I have found my 'try again' spirit. So, in a much better mood this afternoon, I wanted to share some of the good feelings with those I haven't talked to for a little while, or been able to respond to much, if at all, in my troubles recently. The only news I'm sharing really is some basic daily living achievements I've managed today. But, given where I've been at over the past few weeks (basically in bed most of the time, to escape either high anxiety, or from depression), today seems worth celebrating.
It wasn't until about midday that I started slowly moving with any kind of revived spirit. First small increment was brushing my teeth. I knew I wanted to have a shower, after not doing that for about ten days (!), but was still facing heavy resistance and wasn't able to get in there straight away. While struggling with this, I looked at the bed, which was also in a sorry state of uncleanliness. I decided if I stripped it, I'd have to change the bedding at some point today. I also realised that if I did that, I'd be more likely to have a shower, as I wouldn't want to lay my unclean body on clean sheets. So strip it I did.
That led me to giving the mattress and lambswool underlay a good going over with eucalyptus spray to freshen things up. Then I found myself going another step further and putting on a fresh sheet. That led to fresh pillow cases, and finally, the most demanding of the bedding tasks for me: getting a new doona cover on the doona. At each step I continued spraying eucalyptus until finally I had a beautifully made, fresh smelling bed!
Momentum had started flowing at this point and I got myself in the shower. I spent a long time in there, very thoroughly cleaning every part of myself, from top to toe and everywhere in between. I even exfoliated my skin all over with one of those fluffy brush things you can get for showers. By the time I was finished, I was a new woman.
With a clean bed and a clean me, my thoughts turned to the big basket of washing I'd accumulated over the past few weeks. So I kept on going!
In the past four hours, I've done five loads of washing and now have an empty basket and a full line. I've also tidied up the kitchen. In addition, I've made an appointment with my GP for Monday, to talk about the chest pains I was having yesterday (the nurse I spoke to about it on the government health line told me to do this). I've also filled out my little dates diary with various things I aim to do over the next few weeks, as it often helps motivate me to have things written there in black and white. I think I may have done some other things I can't remember now. Suffice to say, it's been a much better day, and I now feel more optimistic about tomorrow too.
So, leaving my epic post at this happy conclusion, I will now take my reward: two hours of watching Star Trek. Thanks for reading if you made it this far! Love and kind wishes to all, from a happier and once again more hopeful, Maz. 
Hello @Mazarita
I started to smile as I read further into your post...
the smile widened as I continued to read...grinning by the end..
wow what a transformation...
all of that washing...
the freshly made bed sounding like a holiday resort with all the spraying of eucalyptus..
enjoy your Star Trek...
take care 
Hi @Dadcaringalone, great to hear your son has agreed to the GP appointment. Good to hear things may move forward with the private psychiatrist referral too, and that you will then discuss things further with your wife. Thanks for the encouragement of my very basic, but big for me, activities today. I will be enjoying sleeping tonight! 
Thanks to you too, @Faith-and-Hope. Hope your art studies are continuing to be enjoyable and rewarding.
Hi @Sophia1, thanks for your smiles and grins. Glad to have given rise to those. My bedroom will feel like a resort compared to how it was before! Star Trek was very enjoyable, as always, even though I've seen just about every episode before. It's often a high point in my days. Hoping that your ongoing medical recovery is proceeding steadily, and that you are settling more and more into your new home.
My next TV interest for the night will be the second part of 'How Mad Are You?' on SBS at 8.30. I watched the first part last week and found it interesting. There's a special forum event talking with someone from the show here tonight at 9.30pm. Unfortunately, because I'm in Queensland where we don't have daylight savings, I'll have to miss the forum discussion, as I'll be watching the show itself at that time. Plan to read all the posts afterwards though. Looking forward to some interesting discussion.
Best wishes to all for enjoyable moments over the rest of this evening.
thanks @Mazarita
hoping to head over to the forum now have just finished watching the programme..have no idea if still going or not
Hello @Mazarita @outlander
I watched both episodes of the series...
I found parts emotional
I won't say anything about the programme itself so that you can watch it..
can always talk about it after..
not sure how long the threads around the discussions stay open..
are they always there for comments?
Well I feel sad now....a build up of sad...I am learning to tell myself that it is ok for now...they are real feelings and it is ok to have them..
on that note I do not want to make either of you feel sad ...
hope that you continue to feel refreshed and can also get some sleep in your lovely exotic refreshed eucalyptic smelling bed...
@outlanderwe will just have to pretend...I do have some peppermint oil in the office I might dab some of that on a tissue...
hopefully it is not an essential oil that keeps you awake..
night night ladies...
nice to feel safe to chat on here again..
what a funny world it is..
I'VE GOT A FENCE! & REAL GATES!!!!
Oh Mazy @Mazarita I am beaming down an Enterprise sized bundle of love at warp factor 9!
My heads pretty befuzzled, I've had {I don't mean to be unappreciative or offensive} a bunch of strange men on my property for the past couple of days. I'm actually extremely impressed that the whole 20 acres was done in 2 days!!! I done nothing the past 2 days, I didn't even make the bed yesterday, I forgot to lock the shed & the van the other night. I've been waking up before my 6.30am alarm & not managing pumpkin hour. . . but it's soooooo worth it!!! 🙂 It'll take me a while to believe it's real. I took the puppies for their first off-lead walk around home since the nasty neighbour nabbed the Staffy, yesterday & he was soooo excited {that just upped my excitement even more :)} I have to do something with the gates as they have too big a gap underneath & he just went straight under them - but that's ok, my brains already coming up with ideas for that. I've got to bathe today {I couldn't tell you how many days it's been}, the dirts all fluffy around the fence line due to the tractor clearing the way & it makes for very dirty feet & lower legs - enough that they're gotten a nasty itch up. I actually did rinse them off the first night, but last night, by the time my head wound down enough to think of laying down, I just didn't have it in me to face cold water; besides that the little dog found something 'wonderful' last time we walked in the forest, so it's been a few days of a stinky little dog rolling around in my sheets . . . gotta change the bed too 😉
I'm going into my little town today. The day the fence contractor said they were coming out I was going to go into town for some butter, now I'll get bread & butter, & I've got a dvd to pick up from the library. I need to go into the bank to make the payment, I'm not confident enough to do it myself online - it's about 4 & 1/2 grand, I wouldn't want to make a mistake.
I know to many it's just a fence but to me it's a dream come true. I had saved for a fence many years ago, but my then husband wanted a computer & the way he did it was to buy one & give it to me as a birthday present - but it was with my money . . . & I wanted a fence. Well now I've got it, I've wanted this & waited about 18 years!!
Love to all that need or want it
