Lived Experience Forum

[Crazy_Bug_Lady]

Hey @Former-Member ! I always forget I'm not the only SA person! Everything always seems to be on the east coast.

@Former-Member we didn't make a coping plan, I meant my S plan...
I have the farm on Sundays, so I'm trying to focus on that for now.

[Former-Member]

great resource @Former-Member

@Crazy_Bug_Lady hopefully your psych can create a coping plan with you for the future... I am really pleased to hear that you are thinking about tomorrow, I hope your heifer is going well 🙂 she is very cute!

[Ace85]

I've struggled in this area on and off for about 19 years (saying that makes me feel old...) I think one of the worst things is feeling like there's no one to talk to when my mood is low - that's why I love this site. I mean, what kind of society is it, that we have to pay someone to listen to us? The last time I told someone I was feeling suicidal, I ended up being scheduled and when I refused to get in the ambulance, the people present threatened to call the police - which left me no choice but to get in the ambulance. I was only at the hospital for about 2 hours (seen by a doctor for about 10 minutes) and then released. Right now whenever I'm around authority figures I get anxious - that even includes my parent, my uni lecturers (I haven't attended classes for weeks now) etc. If I had my way, I wouldn't leave my room. 

I will admit, that listening to music helps - I even have music playing while I sleep when I feel this anxious. Watching tv also is something that helps, as it's a distraction. I know it doesn't solve the problem, but it manages to keep me sane (so to speak). I have found in the past that drawing is a great way of expressing myself. I also write in a journal, not as something that I plan on looking back on at some point in the future to look at what my life was like, but just as a way of untangling all of my thoughts - besides, a journal won't interrupt me while I'm talking nor will it share my secrets. 🙂

[Crazy_Bug_Lady]

Hi guys,

Sorry, I dunno what else to do. I desperately want to SH, and because I feel like I can't, I think of suicide. I am trying to distract myself by braiding thread (it sometimes helps). It's not helping.
I was sorta hoping someone was around to talk to for a bit.

[Former-Member]

Hi @Crazy_Bug_Lady, you don't sound like you're going to well.

What's happening with you at the moment? Anything I can do to help?

[Crazy_Bug_Lady]

Hey @Former-Member

There's nothing major going on, just life I suppose.

Just was hoping to chat to someone for a bit if possible...

[Former-Member]

Hi 😉 I'm here for a bit,
How's your gorgeous baby girl??
Are you going out to the farm tomorrow? I'm aiming for distracting you but feel free to chat about whatever you want need etc
Lj

[JoseJones]

CBL, I'm saddened to hear you're experiencing such emotional turmoil. Has the braiding been an effective strategy for you in the past? What sort of things do you think you can do instead to distract yourself? Another activity you can immerse yourself in that will take some concentration?

[Former-Member]

I'd love to chat!

I'm having a quiet satdurday night at home watching dr who and pretending to do a little study, and I can certainly relate to the feeling suicidal..... I think that's most of what I've been feeling for the past month or so, but today I'm having a good day. What normally helps when you're feeling this bad?

I find sometimes if it's really bad a long walk sometimes get's the agitation out....

[Crazy_Bug_Lady]

Hi LJ!!

Thanks for the distraction. Killara's okay I think. She's getting an injection tomorrow (all the young girls are, to make sure they're not pregnant), then we're off to another farm, to help them with some weaning.